Feelings follow behaviour

Not sure what to write or if I even feel like writing tonight with all the pressure we are under at the moment at University but I guess I will have to have a go at it and as they say, there’s no time like the present.

In my life the only thing that has ever mattered is getting married and having babies, not lots of babies but two will suffice. At times though I catch myself thinking…’will I ever get married???’ This is a new thought pattern that has started and it makes me nervous because by thinking this, it must be showing in my behaviour and therefore I am sending out mixed messages in terms of body language etc. This sort of behaviour was obviously stimulated by a specific feeling that has hurt me in the past and I do not want this to interfere with my future.

I think I need to work on positive thoughts and make sure those who surround me understand that I am not a threat but something that needs to be cared for and looked after just as much as the next person. Positive thinking and acting in a positive manner are the only way to receive the same in return.

I have always believed that what you give out is what you receive back and so I just need to stop thinking of the negative and what could happen and think of the positive and what will happen.